Battling loneliness in the City of Lights I was suggested to start blogging, so here goes nothing.
I grew up for almost half my life hearing about Le Cordon Bleu and dreaming about studying in it, now that I am here it still feels like a dream. A little happy, a little sad; very uncertain and very very lost. This year started off with such promises and love, oh don't mistake me the school is great just as I imagined it to be.
Loss is such a negative word and I never wanted to use it but how else do I express the feeling of losing someone ? Sometimes I hope to wake up and see that it has been dream all along, but in vain. I was told by a great man that life is all about living it to the fullest with no regrets, he wanted me to make him proud. But I can't help but feeling that I am letting this wonderful man down in every way possible. He admired the strength in me, but I can't bring myself to face his loved ones. The look of absolute dejection in their eyes is something I can't bear and I make every excuse possible to escape from looking at it.
When I am in school I feel absolutely happy because I am enjoying what I learn every second I am there and it also helps me in keeping the agony of loss at bay.
At school there are some really wonderful people who inspire me, students and chefs alike. Among chefs I started off hating one, he keeps making fun of his weight ( which I find irrelevant cause he is not fat ) but as I had him for more classes I started to look deeper and I realised all that he does is for our own good. I could see myself improving, he has been pushing us all along to reach this point and that realisation changed my perception about him and he my most favorite chef in the school now. Among students there is this extraordinary girl, a gifted writer and a dreamer. Our friendship started off in a way I never expected it to, in class one day as I was working on the cream she came up to me and asked where the chocolate was and I in feverish desperation to finish off what I was doing pointed at the wrong pot without realising that I gave the wrong instructions. While most people would've killed me for what I did, she forgave and forgot. Quite a way to start a friendship if you ask me.
This new world is definitely teaching me a lot; not just about gastronomy, but life and coping mechanism.
I grew up for almost half my life hearing about Le Cordon Bleu and dreaming about studying in it, now that I am here it still feels like a dream. A little happy, a little sad; very uncertain and very very lost. This year started off with such promises and love, oh don't mistake me the school is great just as I imagined it to be.
Loss is such a negative word and I never wanted to use it but how else do I express the feeling of losing someone ? Sometimes I hope to wake up and see that it has been dream all along, but in vain. I was told by a great man that life is all about living it to the fullest with no regrets, he wanted me to make him proud. But I can't help but feeling that I am letting this wonderful man down in every way possible. He admired the strength in me, but I can't bring myself to face his loved ones. The look of absolute dejection in their eyes is something I can't bear and I make every excuse possible to escape from looking at it.
When I am in school I feel absolutely happy because I am enjoying what I learn every second I am there and it also helps me in keeping the agony of loss at bay.
At school there are some really wonderful people who inspire me, students and chefs alike. Among chefs I started off hating one, he keeps making fun of his weight ( which I find irrelevant cause he is not fat ) but as I had him for more classes I started to look deeper and I realised all that he does is for our own good. I could see myself improving, he has been pushing us all along to reach this point and that realisation changed my perception about him and he my most favorite chef in the school now. Among students there is this extraordinary girl, a gifted writer and a dreamer. Our friendship started off in a way I never expected it to, in class one day as I was working on the cream she came up to me and asked where the chocolate was and I in feverish desperation to finish off what I was doing pointed at the wrong pot without realising that I gave the wrong instructions. While most people would've killed me for what I did, she forgave and forgot. Quite a way to start a friendship if you ask me.
This new world is definitely teaching me a lot; not just about gastronomy, but life and coping mechanism.
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